Promised Land

My life changed 5 years ago on this date. Last night I was thinking about the transition I went through 5 years ago and wanted to remember some of the faith-stretching steps that led me to CCC so I grabbed a few old journals off the shelf and began looking back.

5 years ago to this day (Oct 16), my dear friend Monica spoke the words that released me. When she spoke, I knew that God was opening a door to something beyond. I went through the next 6 months wondering where God was leading. I didn't have a clue. But it is fun to read some of the thoughts that were going through my mind as I struggled to be Spirit-led. Thoughts like:

• October 20, 2001 "I want You to make me into something I'm not. Although I know Your Spirit is active and accomplishing things through me, I feel like I'm serving within the limits of my abilities. I just want more. I want to be willing to step into things that are bigger than me. Things that only you could do. Things that aren't safe and controlled. I want to give you the opportunity to make me into what I'm not for your glory."

Hmmm... Children's Director? I think God answered this one.

• November 11, 2001 "I think I might like to do something different than campus ministry. I think about the possibility of working in a growing church. And the more I think about it, the more I think about Chicago. I really think I'd like to go live in the Chicago area for a while...with museums and parks and lots of new things to discover."

Enough said.

• November 25, 2001 "It really does feel like you are calling me to step out in a new way--to a new future. There is 'venturing forth' in this. Beth Moore's admonition to 'go put my foot on my personal Promised Land' continues to echo in my soul. The minute Monica said, "Do you think it is time you considered leaving Charleston?" I felt like an unknown but real future opened up before me--something beyond this place. I'd never seen beyond this before. I'd never considered that I was made for something beyond--that my Promised Land was still out there."

It took 5 more months until the future became clear and I had plans to move to Naperville to join the staff of CCC. My faith never felt so alive as it did during those months of uncertainty. It didn't feel like I was going after anything...just that I was trying to feel my way through the dark. I only sent out 2 resumes. One to Willow Creek because it was the only church I knew in the Chicago area at the time. The other to a church a friend mentioned to me in early January 2002. He didn't tell me anything about the church. Just the name and that the pastors were some Ferguson brothers. For some reason, I knew I should be listening. I felt my way to CCC.

Looking back on all God was doing and all that he has given, I can't help but be overwhelmed with gratitude. I think I'm in the land he promised to me. It's better than I could have imagined 5 years ago today.

Comments

[Jessie]

I remember the COM meeting (February, right?) when you first told us you were leaving. I remember you meeting with the girls afterwards. Although none of us wanted to see you go, I felt so encouraged as we prayed. I felt not sad, but emboldened to believe that God might have a marvelous plan for me as well. In watching you take those steps of faith, God's work in you became an Ebenezer in my life - a mark of God's faithfulness. I love reading your blog because it is a reminder of that Ebenezer - a reminder that God's faithful, personal work continues to this very day to this very person. Thanks Tammy.

[Tammy]

Thanks, Jessie. Your words are very encouraging to me!